Can we be done now?

School and I are best friends. I love going to school and hate when I have to miss class. But ever since midterms began I've been in a fit. I really do not want to work and I procrastinate as much as I possibly can until I have to do the work because I freak out I'll fail.

Example, this week I planned to get everything done and planned everything out strictly so there was no time for shenanigans at all. Well, that back fired and I ended up waiting till the last minute on each assignment. Resulting in having to stay up until 5 a.m. on Thursday night to finish the 5-8 page paper that was due Friday afternoon.

I don't know what seems to be wrong with me. I'm in a bit of a school work slump and don't really want to do anything that does not involve newspaper. Luckily I'm almost done with General Education requirements. I hope to be done with all of them by next fall. I think I'm taking just two GenEd classes next semester which is pretty sweet. And then all the rest are writing classes for my major and minor! YAY!

Is it bad that I just want it to be Winter Break already and just want to sleep and sit around the house all day? I think so... That's probably really bad. I don't know what's wrong with me. :/

Guess I'll just have to tough it out for another month and 10 days. WHOA! Is that ALL that's left?! Dang... maybe I can tough it through this. I think I just got a rush of pumpage to keep going. Especially since a week of that is Thanksgiving break. So it's more like a months and 3 days... WOO! haha. XD

Patience is a virtue

I realized I needed to put up the last blog of the month. So here I am. Today I took two exams, I think I did decently. On the Philosophy exam at least. haha.

My mind has been wandering a lot this evening. Which is a major bummer because I'm trying to catch up on my History of England to 1688 reading so I can write a paper that is due this coming Tuesday.

I've just been thinking a lot about everything. I hate when I'm reading, writing or just plain listening and my ears are listening, but my brain checks out. I really need to learn how to pay more attention and stop worrying about everything. I have a God who has a plan for my life, and in no way can I change His plan. I may think I'm making those decision according to my own free will, but nope, God is using those for His will.

Sometimes I wish I could just pick God's brain about the things that happen in my life and others'. Like what were You thinking when You allowed this to happen. Why did You decide for me to make that decision. Although, at the same time I do not want to know, I just want to be obedient and accept the things that happen.

I find myself most struggling with impatience. I have a really hard time being patient, I want everything to happen now. But again, God is in control of that as well, and I know He has my best interests at heart. I pray that the Lord helps me achieve greater patience because I cannot do this alone.

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13

I hope you all enjoyed Blog Every Day September, good day. :]

Focus Achieved

I got this random burst of focus today. I got home and got straight to work on studying for the Philosophy and American Government exams I have tomorrow. I thought it was rather peculiar, but I'm actually really excited about it. I hope that this continues, I have two papers due next week and it would be nice to continue having this focus and determination to get things done.

I mean part of me didn't even want to blog right now because I didn't want to lose it. But I'm thinking that's not going to happen considering how quickly I am typing this out.My fingers are literally going to fast for my mind and I keep having to go back and rewrite words because they're spelled incorrectly, and we cannot have that on here.

I think it also helped for me to ignore my computer and phone unless absolutely necessary. My phone is currently plugged into the wall so there isn't easy access to it. And my lap top was on my desk, but I needed to access a power point for some answers to government questions. But I think as soon as I finish this blog it may go back. I'm not positive though because I want to continue listening to music.

My phone was providing earlier, but it died. But at the same time I want to shut it off so I can focus and also so I can save my Spotify hours. I feel like I'm going to get cut off soon, and then I'll only have the music I bothered to pay for. haha.

Also, I just realized tomorrow is the last day of Blog Every Day September. I'm kind of relieved. Only because I've kind of run out of topics to talk about, and I'm sure those of you who actually read this are sick of me complaining about everything. Woo. haha.

Whistle while you, nah

I've felt really busy lately, but I feel like I haven't done anything. At least it seems like nothing to me. I know that I've done a lot, but I don't think it's registering in my mind as work. I feel like things are kind of a mess right now. There's a lot I need to do within the next week. I feel like there is so much going on that I don't have enough time to finish it all.

Let's take a look at my forever growing To Do List for the next week or so, shall we?

-Study for Intro to Philosophy exam
-Study for American Government exam
-Catch up on reading for History of England to 1688
-Do reading for Communication Theory
-Take quiz for Communication Theory
-Write blurb for Technological Dependence spread
-Keep up to date with Facebook and Twitter for Internship
-Make sure web is running properly for paper.
-Meet with potential new additions for the web team
-Video Meeting
-Web Meeting
-Write paper for American Government
-Write paper for History of England to 1688
-Clean room
-Clean bathroom
-Wash/clean car
-Breakfast with Lauren (Saturday)

This is all I can come up with off the top of my head, but I'm almost positive there's more. I think I'm starting to feel the stress. Welcome back to school Sharayah. Buck up, be a woman, and do work.

-O-O- <---glasses

I didn't go to school today because of my eye appointment. (Yup, I'm going to have some snazzy glasses soon, maybe I'll wear them more). Usually I get really upset about missing school, but I think it was good for me. I've been a tad stressed lately about school and it was cool to not have to worry about getting to class and having my reading done. I even took a nap, which will probably not serve me well when I try to go to sleep later tonight. However, I enjoyed it at the time, so it's all good. haha.

I was really happy about my appointment, even though I originally was a little upset about not having enough contacts to reach to the appointment. Especially the end of last week when my right eye was not having the contacts. I figured this was because the lenses were getting older and I'm suppose to change them every month. When the optometrist tested my eyes today, she said I had an irritation in my right eye and that I was not allowed to wear the trial lenses she gave me until next Monday.

This unfortunately means I have to wear my lame prescription I currently have, until then. BUT, I will have new contacts AND glasses within the next two weeks or less, which is really exciting. I'm so over my current pair mostly because I'm rather blind. But I think the ones I picked out were really nice, although I cannot be trusted because I picked them half blindly. I'm sure the people there thought I was considering I was inches away from the mirror each time I tried a new pair. It was embarrassing, but I bet all of them were used to it. I cannot be the only one with eyes so bad. haha.

Almost there!

I've been getting really excited about reading my Bible. Seeing as soon this will be the first time I've ever gotten all the way through. I finished the Old Testament a couple days ago. And I've been really enjoying it. You know finding out things I wasn't aware of and getting more in-depth on all those stories I thought I knew pretty well from Sunday school.

I'm glad I'm finally doing this. I should've done it awhile ago, but I feel like this is the right time. This was God's plan for me, and I just fall more and more in love with my creator every day. It's really given me a whole new perspective on what I believe and it's refreshing.

I really stoked to finish it, and then go back and study it even more in-depth. Right now I'm doing a bit of just a read through, but I excited to learn more and just continue shaping my faith. It's just too cool.

Our God truly is an awesome God. :]

Ugh... reading

I don't know what it is with all this reading. I guess because I've mostly taken journalism courses and I don't feel that they are very heavy with reading. It's more hands on and experiences. And the fact that I took all general education courses except one gives me so much reading. I'm trying to balance it with everything else, but it's proving difficult.

I did get some reading done though. There was lots of productivity on History of England to 1688. It wasn't much, but it's more than normal. I did get my assignments for Ethics done though, so I count that as productivity as well. I do still have to study for American Government and Philosophy, but the test isn't until Friday, so I have time!

And I've kind of been doing the whole judging what I need to read by what's going on, rather than just reading it all. #horriblestudent

Well, back to reading for England.

Wait For Me

Thursday night I went to a SHE event at my church with my mother. It was a very uplifting, inspiring and reassuring night. Rebecca St. James, Evie Karlsson and For KING and Country performed and shared about purity and being a faithful woman of God.

I myself have already vowed my purity to God and my future husband. And I really liked the message they gave because I feel like being a virgin this day in age is not something to be ashamed. It's more to be praised. And I believe your virginity is such a precious gift for your future spouse.

I liked the reassurance that my future husband is out there. I really enjoyed Rebecca St. James' song 'Wait For Me'. It was a beautiful song I now hold to dear. She wrote the song for her future husband who is now "her Jacob", she was married 5 months ago, and shared with us how worth it, it is to wait until marriage.

I also enjoyed hearing from For KING and Country, as they shared from a male perspective of how a man should treat a lady. And how we should wait for our "Holy Hunk". It was so touching to hear from a man that we should be treated like princesses and we shouldn't be in unhealthy relationships in which we are treated anything less. There is a man out there for all of us and he doesn't deserve us unless he cherishes us.

Now as a college student I do my best to keep focused on my studies and not obsess over boys like I did in high school. Which has worked for me so far, Praise the Lord. Now this doesn't mean that I completely ignore boys, rather I look to make sure my priorities in check. God comes first, family, studies, friends and then after needs to be looked over, but isn't necessarily as important as the formers.

However, if my future husband is reading this now or some day soon, know I pray you and I will find one another when God permits it. He has a plan for us and I cannot wait to see it unfold with you. I pray you keep Him at the forefront of your life and that you are waiting for me as I am waiting for you. Until that beautiful day. <3

Ouch

I cannot wait to go to the eye doctor on Tuesday. My right eye has been bothering me since yesterday. I believe this is due to over wearing my contacts. But I'm really excited to get new glasses because my current pair is absolutely off.

I've been having a hard time focusing lately. I just can't get in a groove. I want to be doing stuff for school. But it's mostly been reading, and I find it difficult to get into a textbook without falling asleep. I'm all about novels. haha.

I felt weird at school today. I feel like it might have been because I was talking to a few friends about things they were dealing with. And it always bums me out when my friends aren't happy. Especially since it's something I can't exactly help with aside from listening and giving my best judgement. :/

I've been home alone. Most of the night, and I felt kind of lonely and scared. But I was listening to some up beat music that Spotify was unfortunately blasting on my Facebook feed to everyone, which I don't really know how I feel about yet. Oh Facebook, you and your stalker-like changes.

Ohh! Mum and Dad are home! Adieu. :]

Dang I missed it...

I'm not even sure if this blog is up in time. I'm so sorry I didn't post yesterday. We had work night and I didn't get home until right before midnight and when I realized it was too late, so I just decided to forget about it. I hope you all don't hate me because I failed.

It happens though. And all I can do is press forward, so for the remainder of this month I will try to give you all more quality blogs.

Starting tomorrow because I really need to get some sleep. Hopefully no sleep talking...

1, 2, 3, 4 ...

I exercised today. And when I say exercise I pretty much was walking in place for 30 minutes while reading my American Government book.

However, toward the end, I kind of got distracted. I put on some music. I've been really into Owl City the last couple of days. Then I grabbed my scarf off my chair and might have danced around. I think I liked the latter half better. It was just a lot of fun.

I'm planning to hopefully keep this up every day for I don't know how long. But, I feel like it's a step in the right direction, because I can study and exercise. Since I've been pretty much just studying. And that hurts my brain, which is no bueno.

I got my car back today, which is exciting because I don't have to be driven around anymore like I was in high school. Which is beautiful. Tomorrow night is production night, and I'm really looking forward to it because I can stay because I have a car! Yay me!

Other than that, I thought today went splendidly. :]

Just for a second

I keep learning that my bed is the worst place to do homework because of its warmth and comfort, I tend to fall asleep. And then I don't get to be exactly where I want to be homework-wise by the end of the night. I think I'm okay where I'm at right now. I at least finished half of my readings and took my Com Theory Quiz. I got 4.5/ 5 I hate that I missed one. haha. But hey, it happens.

I have some reading for History of England next. It's a lot of reading because I didn't have time to read last week. My birthday kind of got in the way and I didn't really do any reading because I got distracted. And I didn't do anything over the weekend except read for Philosophy. Which put me ahead because I don't have to do any reading till this coming weekend for it.

I do however, need to read for American Government and Ethics as well. What I'm finding curious is that all of my Philosophy, Com Theory and Ethics readings are starting to overlap, they seem to be connected in the ways of Philosophy. Which helps me out because it will become drilled in my mind, yay!

I took on a lot of reading heavy classes this semester. That was something I didn't take into consideration. Although, I am quite grateful there hasn't been too much work aside from reading. I've been assigned a paper for Government and a case study for Ethics. Which is no big deal. I got this. :]

That darn car

When I was younger I always dreamt of having a lime green Volkswagon Beetle. I thought that was the cutest car ever and I wanted it. My junior year of high school I obtained a driver's license and for Christmas I got that exact car.

Goober, I called it. And a goober it really is. I've had a plethora of problems with it over the four years I've owned it. I feel like every couple of months there's something else going wrong with it. About two weeks ago we had problems and paid to have it fixed. But yesterday, something happened to it again. I don't know exactly what, but dad says I cannot drive it.

This is really frustrating seeing as I'm a commuter student. I'll unfortunately be having my mother drive me to and from school until it gets fixed because I cannot borrow her rental doesn't have me on the contract. Her car is in the shop as well.

It's been on my mind lately that I should just get a new used car, because I feel like we keep having to pay more and more to have it fixed. But then I fear that I won't be able to do all the cool things I was planning to do this year. Like go to England. :/

I don't really know what to do about it, we'll see after tomorrow, maybe. Hopefully, my car will be seen tomorrow. #lesigh

Stuff needs to get done

So I'm finding that getting a passport is a lot harder than I thought. Every time I think I'm getting closer to putting the paperwork in, something else happens. I finally have all the paperwork I need, but apparently they don't take people unless they have an appointment on Saturdays. Lame.

I really didn't get a whole lot of work done today. I had planned to get all my reading done, but I haven't touched a single book. I did however, write a To Do List. Nothing has been crossed off though, unfortunately. I have to keep focused though. Everything needs to get done. There is so much going on that needs my attention, and I don't want to get overwhelmed.

I've been hanging with my brother today. I find it weird, but it seems that my brother and I get along a lot better when my parents are gone. I have no idea why. I wish we did, but eh, it happens I suppose.

Also, Natalie is here tonight. I love when Natalie comes over, we always have such fun!

OH! And Pride and Prejudice was SOOOOO GOOD! It's playing at South Coast Repertory! GO SEE IT! I recommend! HIGHLY!!! :D

Just SO excited!

I have to blog REALLY early today because I know that I won't be able to later because I'm sure I'll be home after midnight because I'm going to see PRIDE AND PREJUDICE with Peter! So excited. And it will probably be short too because the red velvet birthday cake is in our fridge and it keeps speaking to me. "Eat me Sharayah, happy birthday to you!" haha. XD

I was suppose to go turn in passport paperwork, but unfortunately the passport office is ALREADY closed. Which I don't understand seeing as the post office doesn't close until 5 p.m. Lame, but it's okay because it's open tomorrow too. Thankfully. I need to get that working so I can look into booking a flight to.... ENGLAND! I'm probably going over spring break. I'm crossing my fingers at least. Each step forward is making more and more excited.

I'm also going to Orlando, FL at the end of next month for a journalism conference. Unfortunately, it's during midterms so I'm going have to keep on task and study really hard the next month and a half so I can excel in the time I will miss. I'm really excited though because we are MOST DEFINITELY going to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter and I get to see my friends Ryan and Lizzie. Which, Ryan is actually attending the conference as well, so I'm just one ball of excitedness. This year is going really well.

I'm pretty sure I aced my philosophy quiz too. yay! :]

I AM 20

Today is my birthday woo! But you knew that because I blogged about it yesterday. That is unless you didn't read my blog yesterday. haha. Regardless, today is my birthday.

I find it funny having a Facebook on birthdays, because I have gone and changed a few of my friend's birthdays on their profiles before. And the thing about Facebook is it tells you when it's someone's birthday. And most of the people who wish you a happy birthday only knew because Facebook told them.

What's even worse, is if someone hacks your profile and one of your close friends wishes you a happy birthday. It's like hey you should know that.

But I promise. Today is my birthday. So feel free to show me some love. haha. :]

I'm an adult

Tomorrow is my birthday. I will be turning 20. The big 2-0. My parents keep telling me I'm an old lady now.

It's weird because I don't feel old, but at the same time I do. I've lived through two decades. I remember pogs, pokemon cards, volunteering to be the yellow power ranger because all the girls always wanted to be the pink, not having a cell phone when I was five, not knowing curse words existed until middle school, being free and not having a care in the world.

But now I have things to worry about like getting myself up in the morning, finding something acceptable in the fridge for breakfast and lunch, going to school, doing my homework without my mother telling me to, working and getting paid so I can put gas in my car, etc.

There's not much that happens when you turn twenty. 19 and 20 are like those awkward ages between the cool 18 and 21 birthdays. Because everyone knows that 18 and 21 are the best birthdays, right? You get so much responsibility.

But I see tomorrow as not having teen at the end of my age. I will be twen-ty. That means I'm an adult, right?

It's the little things

I purchased a lamp at Target yesterday because the ceiling fan in my room doesn't provide enough light and it makes it harder to see anything other than my Macbook when it gets later in the night.

I'm rather careful with how I spend my money seeing as I'm a commuting college student. I like to keep everything in check and every so often I won't do things that will cost me. Gas is expensive guys. haha.

When I do spend my money it's usually on the essentials, in yesterday's case a lamp. Now I didn't need the lamp per say, but my desk is now lit up. And I find my desk more comforting to sit and study at than laying across my comfortable, warm bed curled up with a textbook. Considering I usually pass out within five minutes of my head hitting the books.

Now these purchases of the essentials make me feel more of an adult. You know, not having to rely so much on my parents, rather I'm fending for myself. At least as much as I can considering I live in my parents house and they don't charge me rent. Praise the Lord.

I think what I'm trying to get at is it's the little things that make me happy. haha. Bet you didn't see that one coming.

Are these blogs getting lamer as the days are going?

It's not 11 p.m.

Peter just told me I have to blog before 11 p.m. tonight. I'M HERE! haha.

I feel like I was all over the place today. I woke up late, which I've been doing the last couple of days. My ideal time I want to be able to consistently wake up this year is 6:30 a.m. Considering I don't have class until 10 a.m. on MWF and 11 a.m. on TR, you probably think I'm nuts. But I'm not. Ideally, I would like to wake up at 6:30 a.m., have my quiet time, do some exercising, eat breakfast, get ready for school and be out of the house by the necessary time.

I'm doing my best to get to this, but I've been having a bit of difficulty getting there. I'm a night owl and I feel best later in the night, but that results in not being a morning person and wanting to catch up on said sleep I missed the night before. I mean I set my alarm for 6:30 a.m. every night for the next morning. However, snooze usually gets pushed until 7:30/8 a.m.

Kudos for trying? Okay maybe not. I agree, I'm lame. I tried putting my phone across the room, but that just results in me stumbling around to turn it off and retreat back to bed. I definitely need to go to bed earlier, I feel like that should help. I thought I had started it last week and was going to succeed, but then I went to bed late one night and messed it up.

So going back to me waking up late, I missed a breakfast date with The Banner staff, which Neil is not going to let me forget because he's mean. haha. Went to Philosophy, ate lunch and did some American Government homework during my break, went to Ethics, sat in on Banner but did American Government homework, went to American Government, bought a lamp at Target, made a video for BacheloretteBrigade, put clothes away, ate dinner with the family, attempted Communication Theory reading, fell asleep, attempted ComTheory reading again, and was then forced to write a blog.

I think it's great that I can recall of that. I have such a good memory. haha. My lamp is providing good light. I wish it was a little brighter, but it's better than the nothingness that my ceiling fan provides. Aside from all of this I've been in a really good mood. The smile on my face has yet to disappear. :D

Blog time, not on time

It's kind of lame when you inform your classmates early in the day via introduction that you're blogging every day this month, and then forget until 11 p.m. that night you forgot to blog. Nice going, Sharayah. I think the fact of it not being tomorrow yet, makes this okay. I'm trying to decide whether I should start my day off by blogging, but I already have a lot to then.

I was just doing some Philosophy and American Government homework and listening to the instrumental Tangled soundtrack. Well, I don't know if I would call it homework. It was more I decided I was going to read the introduction and first chapter before class this week since we are suppose to have it read anyway. I don't consider reading homework. It's more necessary for me to learn, I've also been taking notes. These notes being key terms, but notes nonetheless.

I'm striving to have immaculate notes this semester. I want to be extremely organized and prepared, I like schedules. I feel like if I'm organized and prepared I'll do better. My friend, Peter, told me recently my life needs an itinerary. I'm not going to lie to you, I agree. I need to know what I'll be doing when. And that's why I give you my Google Calendar/iCal/ Agenda. As I am equipping myself with these this semester.

I have almost everything down to a T. Which I'm liking. I just need to stick to it, aside from going to class. Class is required, everything is optional. And that needs to change. I can't keep procrastinating until the last minute. I have a lot of coursework heavy classes this semester, and it needs to get done NOW!

[Returns to tackling her American Government reading]

O-O

I've resorted to wearing my glasses on the weekends because my contacts are starting to get to the point where they need to be changed, but I don't have any more and I don't go to the optometrist for another two weeks?

That's REALLY bad. Unfortunately, last month I lost one of my contacts while driving and couldn't find it when I pulled over. Since it was like a week or so before I needed to change my contacts and I only had one pair left, there wasn't a lot I could do. So I had to use my last pair early, and we couldn't get an appointment scheduled right away is sucks because my glasses are extremely out of date because I've been just buying contacts and haven't gotten a new pair in a really long time.

So right now, I'm wearing my glasses, as I have been all day. And I just have to say my vision is already horrible as it is, these glasses aren't really helping. Which stinks, but I kind of have to make do. At least I don't have class on the weekends. That helps a lot. But I feel really blind.

Luckily, I didn't have any plans this weekend. I've also been taking my contacts out as soon as I get home from school during the week. I cannot wait to go to the optometrist. I decided I'm going to only buy half the amount of contacts I normally do and get a new pair of glasses. I'm sure this will make me wear them more, considering the ones I have now fall off my face when I look down.

Just two weeks, two weeks.

No breaks, no mistakes

It can't be Friday night already. I'm really hoping the rest of the year doesn't go by like this. I mean I want to busy, but not this busy. I want to have time to do the things I want to do as well as do the whole school thing. But I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to handle being this busy.

I feel like I did so little today, class at 10, chapel at 11, newspaper stuff from noon to 5 (did I really spend that many hours working on the newspaper? That's just insane), ate dinner 5:30, Nutella cookies from 6:30 to 730, and Big Bang Theory from then till now still.

I don't think that's too much. The newspaper stuff I was working on definitely went quite long. I just couldn't figure out the video editing for the longest time. And in the end I did it another way, but it came out a lot better than I expected.

I don't think I should be complaining. Last week I was complaining about having nothing to do. I cannot now complain because I have all the things in the world to do. That's just not fair. I have to stick it through. I know I can do this, I have my to do lists ready. I've been checking things off one and at time, and even though it's late still getting most of what needs to get done, done. And I find that a great accomplishment.

What do you mean tomorrow is Friday?

I feel like my classes went by rather fast today, actually the whole day went by fast. I only have two classes on Tuesday/ Thursday and I think they might be my favorites. I have History of England to 1688 and Communication Theory. I say this because one, I love England, and two I really need to work on my communications skills.

I realized once again why being a commuter sometimes stinks. If one of your middle classes gets cancelled or shorten, you can be stuck with no where to go. Luckily, I consider the Newsroom and the Lab my second homes, so I wound up just chilling in there with some friends. I still think the cost of living on campus vs. at home is what makes me realize a half hour to hour wait isn't that big of a deal.

My friend Kira and I went to go visit Women's Choir this afternoon. They're doing very well. It was a little weird because they are definitely not the same choir they were a few months back. There's a lot of people missing as well as a lot of new people. We only sat on about three songs, only one being a song we sang last year, but I was impressed with the progress they've made already. It made me kind of wish I was still involved. Like I could be a part of that gorgeous sound. But I also realize there's a reason as to why I'm no longer involved. I don't have the time to dedicate nor the units. But it did bring back a lot of great memories.

The first edition of the Banner comes out tomorrow. I've already placed a few articles online. I have a really good feeling about this year in newspaper. I think it's going to be a very productive, challenging, and all around fun year. And tomorrow is just the beginning.

Also, two of my classes are already cancelled. So I'll have to wait around a little bit. But eh, it's not too bad. No worries.

That first day

Back in school! Yay for schedules! I feel like a real nerd loving school so much, but I just cannot help it. There's just so much here that I love. My friends, my classes, my work, and my passions. I cannot wait for the school year to really kick off though. Now we're just doing the whole run down on the syllabus, aside from newspaper type stuff. But I like it so far.

It's only the first day so I haven't even seen all my classes yet. I'M A JUNIOR NOW! That's so crazy, but so cool. I've been blessed to have someone I know in each of my classes so far, which makes it comforting, especially if I have to miss. Which I really hope I don't. When I got sick in February it took everything in me not to go to class. It was strictly doctor's orders that kept me home.

Although, I am really excited about my professors. I can tell already that my philosophy professor is going to be great. He's a riot and it seems like philosophy is going to be very intriguing and thought provoking. I'm not so sure I will like American Government, but the professor seems to be wanting to make it be fun. And I of course know Ethics in PR & Journalism is going to be a breeze because the professor is great and I've had her before.

I bought two textbooks today and I kind of want to cry because of how costly they are. Why am I being punished for pursuing higher education?! haha. Regardless, I'm looking for the cheapest and best conditions. And sometimes that comes at a high price. Oh well, it can't be too much more. I only have three more classes to buy for, at least I hope.

I.. Uhh.. Err.. Okay..

I realized how shy I really can be today. I helped work the involvement fair on campus for J at CBU. The involvement fair is basically this fair on campus where programs on and off campus set up tables in our gyms and give information about their programs to the new freshmen. J at CBU is basically our Journalism program, which is composed of our newspaper, magazine, yearbook, and public relations.

You'd think that because Journalism is heavily based on communications and writing, I'd have no problem. I mean I feel rather confident in my writing abilities and consider myself a decent writer. But when it comes to having to talk to people, especially to people I do not know, I often myself at a loss for words. I wish I could turn it on or off, but I some times find this rather difficult. Usually when I know a lot about the topic I need to discuss I'm set more at ease, but I think it's more about initiating a conversation.

Like how do you get that person to be really hooked on what you have to say? How can you know? Especially when everyone is different. I have a few key hooks I like to use, "What are you interested in?", "What's your major?", or "Read any good books lately?" But then again that can only take you so far, and if I can't keep the conversation going I tend to feel rather awkward. Sometime I can deal with awkwardness. I mean I have a shirt that reads "This is awkward, but I like it!" And I mean I do, in small doses.

It's a lot easier to ignore the fear of talking when I have pressure. Not the bad kind of pressure, more the good kind. Where I think of the positives. And some days I just find myself outgoing. It doesn't happen so often, but those days are my favorite. It makes things so much easier.

I think what I need to focus on is just not caring what happens. If I don't care about the outcome it may be easier. Even if I find disappointments, it's better that I've asked than not knowing at all.

Yeah, that's probably what I need to do.

Is this going to shock me?

I was all snuggled up in my bed literally 5 minutes ago ready to catch up on all the sleep I missed out on last night. I had even tweeted a goodnight tweet and set my phone on the headboard above. And as I was just about to drift off to dream land it hit me. I hadn't written a blog yet.

Sorry, I just thought I should inform you as to why this blog is up as "late" as it is. I pretty much spent about 27 hours with Peter and Natalie yesterday/ today. Natalie and I spent the night over at Peter's. But we pretty much stayed up until 3 or 4 a.m. this morning playing this game called 'Scratches". It was rather terrifying seeing as we were all really sleepy and the game was a "mystery" type game.

It's amazing how darkness and scary music can make your mind play tricks on you. There was a plethora of scream, jumping and holding one another as we pressed on through out the game. But seeing as we really needed to go to bed we crashed "early" and just picked up on the game later this evening.

I really like hanging out with Peter and Natalie. I feel like whenever Peter takes us some where we get educated. And I really like that, not only do I get to see different parts of my state in which I do not normally partake, but I also get cultured in different cuisines. Last night Peter took us out for real ramen, which I had before but Natalie hadn't. It's delicious regardless. haha.

But today we went out to eat with Peter's mama and some of her friends to a legit Chinese restaurant. It was really interesting to see the differences between what I had consider Chinese food and what actual Chinese food is like. I mean I ate a jellyfish! Well, not a whole jellyfish, but one of his tentacles. I was really afraid it was going to sting me (hush, it's a legit concern), but apparently they don't shock you once they've been cooked. Who knew? haha.

Today was pretty much my last real day of vacation. I cannot believe I start school Wednesday. I swear just last week I had 4 weeks left until school started. The time flew by really fast with all the events at the end of July/ beginning of August. However, I have to admit, this has been definitely one of my favorite summers. But I am excited to go back to school as well. JUNIOR! WHAT? WHAT! haha.

Well, i definitely have ALL of the tired now. I'm off to be.... ZzZzZzZz.... ;]

The rain is beautiful, silly

I was driving to my friend, Peter's apartment prior to writing this blog. And right as I got on the freeway it started raining. I found this bizarre because I mean it's summer. I live in southern California. It shouldn't be raining, right?

However, the weather has been acting rather bipolar recently, and not just in California. Flooding, rain storms, hurricanes, and even though I realize they aren't a type of weather, earthquakes in places they don't "belong".

I mean I love the rain just as much, no probably more, than the next person.

what I'm really trying to get at is that I love the rain. But the weather is acting up. And as much as I'd love for it to be pouring and raining and thunder. I feel fall should wait till it's for us to say goodbye to summer.

yeah, I feel like I just talked in circles and didn't really have a point. I just love rain.

I heart Sheldon Cooper

When I commit to things I should probably remember that I'm doing so. I just started watching Big Bang Theory and realized 3.5 minutes in that I haven't written my blog for the day yet.

Well, here I am half watching the Big Bang Theory and half writing this blog. It's hard to stop it because I've established a new love for it. The way Sheldon Cooper speaks just makes me smile so big. All of the characters on that show are just so entertain, I cannot help but laugh.

I've been spending a lot of time watching all the seasons of shows this summer. I have a problem with watching TV shows out of order. I feel like it ruins it, even if the show doesn't really follow a pattern. I haven't gotten through any whole series this summer, but I did catch up with Doctor Who.

This made me really excited seeing as the new season started up last Saturday and we have BBC America so I was able to watch it live! I watched last week's episode with my mother and this week I watched the newest with my brother and dad. They all seem to like it. Mom heard us watching it from upstairs tonight and texted me not to delete Doctor Who. This made my day.

Also, considering I'm in series four of Big Bang Theory, I cannot wait until the 5th series starts up this fall. I'm not a big fan of watching TV, more or less I tend to catch my shows on Hulu or other sites that allow you to watch shows you've missed later. I find myself rather busy during the school year, and it's reassuring to know that just because I position school before TV doesn't mean I have to miss out entirely.

5 hours isn't enough sleep?

I've been feeling really lazy today and I'm a tad upset about it. Laziness is exactly what I've been trying to avoid. I want to get back in the groove of doing things since fall semester starts next Wednesday. You know waking up at 6:30 a.m. and getting everything out of the way for my 10 a.m. class.

No, I'm not nuts, I'm just determined. I've been looking forward to starting my junior year of college. So many changes are going down this year and I have a lot more responsibility on my plate. I have no room for mistakes and I'm going to make sure that I get everything done before it needs to be done.

No more slacking, no more leaving things to the last minute and definitely no more procrastinating. I have to make sure I'm doing the best I can and worrying about little things later. I need to focus and keep my eye on the prizes. Which are continuing to fall deeper in love with my Savior and essentially graduate in two years.

I've made sure to aid in both goals. I'm currently working on reading the entire Bible in 90 days. I've unfortunately messed up quite a few times, but I'm scheduled to be completely finish in the beginning of October. Which is really exciting for me. I want to be able to understand more and grow through that to become the woman of God, God has created me to be.

In the sense of graduating on time, I'm not sure if that's possible seeing as they've yet to allow me to meet with an enrollment adviser, but I feel like I've been doing everything on track. I haven't really taken any classes that should interfere with that, I hope.

I need to make the habits I won't form, but I recently learned that it takes 21 to 28 days to form a habit. And at first I thought I had a leg up and was doing great. But then I went to bed late and couldn't get myself out of bed at 6:30 a.m. I'm just going to keep trying and hope for the best.

Please don't leave me . . .

Lately USA has been airing lots of Crime Dramas such as Law & Order: Special Victim Units/ Criminal Intent and NCIS. Not don't get me wrong, I LOVE watching Crime Dramas. I like to go along with the main characters and try to solve the case. Sometimes I am write and sometimes I am wrong, but in the end they are just Crime Dramas.

And I know that they're just Crime Dramas, but they also make paranoid. I get really paranoid when I am home alone and it gets worse in the evening. I make up so many explanations for the house settling, the dogs barking, the wind blowing and the dogs hitting their tails against the window. When I say explanations, I mean I play scenarios of people breaking in, robbing the place or killing me.

I'm sure this isn't healthy for my sanity. I don't want to be afraid of being home by myself. When my parents are home, especially my dad I feel safe. But this is a fear I need to get over. I mean, I'm two years away from being able to move out of my parent's house. And I don't know how that's going to go down. I could be living with a roommate(s) or by myself, and I don't want to put myself in a position where I don't feel comfortable in my own house.

I'm the type of person who doesn't like to be alone. I like to be surrounded by friends or family. But I need to become a person who is alright with being alone. I mean in some cases I am. These are the times when things need to get done and I do not have time to wait around for someone to come with me.

I also feel that I need to rely more on God in these situations. He is my father, my protector and I need to realize that He has the plan for my life. He has created me in His image. That should give me the comfort to know I can do all things through Him who gives me strength. He can give me the courage to be home alone, all I have to do is cast all my worries on Him and everything will be just fine. :]

DAY 30 - Analysis

As of this blog, I have posted a blog once a day consecutively for 30 days. I consider this quite the accomplishment because going into this I really didn't think I was going to make it, and that I would run out of things to say within the first week. However, I worked through the bumps along the way and have come up with a lot of blog posts I'm rather proud of. I feel like this was definitely a good experiment. I pushed myself to be consistent with my posts and I came out successful.

So overall, I think this month went well. I got a lot done, and there’s so much to come in July. I’m really looking forward to moving into our “new” house. Everything except our beds will be moved Saturday. My room is so empty, there’s a duffel bag of clothes I will be living out for the next couple of days, my laptop case, a water bottle, and my purse. There are clothes in my closet, but those will be taken tomorrow. Other than that I have nothing. My bathroom is still intact, but not for long.

Saturday I’m going to the beach with some friends. I’m really excited because the beach has been calling my name since the weather started getting hotter. I cannot wait to get into the ocean and hang out with a group of friends at the beach.

I still need to finish Catching Fire so I can read Mockingjay and give the books back to Krista. I’m really enjoying them. I wish I had a day to dedicate to reading, but with the move going down, I really cannot.

And then VidCon is at the end of the month, and I can hardly contain my excitement. It’s going to be great.

At this point in time, I do not know when I’ll be able to post another blog because I’m not sure when Wi-Fi will be set up in the “new” house. However, I will keep you posted. :]

Day 29 - Music Influences

Disclaimer: I do not intend to offend anyone or take away his or her right to an opinion. This blog is strictly MY opinion.
 
Music has become a big part of my life. Not so much the playing aspect because I mean really, as much as I'd love to be able to play the piano or guitar, I can't. However, I do love to sing and listen to music. Over the years the bands and musicians I listen to have drastically changed in regards to the instrumentals, the lyrics, and my taste. And I've learned for a song to really catch my attention it needs to have both excellent lyrics and instrumentals, which of course is key to any song.
 
There have been times where I will just listen to the song for either, but I've come to the conclusion that I need to guard my ears. There's horrible music in the world today, and I find myself often times turning off the radio because I cannot stand the music. I don't think a lot of today's music is appropriate. Music is a big influence on everybody, especially younger generations. And with the things kids nowadays are being shown, we shouldn't be surprised of the ways they are acting and portraying themselves. If they saw it on so-and-so on television or so-and-so talked about it in their song, why wouldn't they find it acceptable?
 
I feel that music should be something that inspires as well as lifts you up. I don't need to know what you do in what should be the privacy of your home, who with, or what a not so eloquent vocabulary you have. I feel lyrics should be relatable to the listener or something the musician is truly feeling. And I feel that there are better ways to convey those feelings without using profanity and swearing. I find I'm more likely to listen to a song that makes sense as well. Rhyming is nice and all, but one should really think about the ultimate meaning.
 
I try to listen to all genres of music, but I'm really not a big fan of rap or country. I think rap is confusing and country is just depressing. Not all, but most.  I like Christian Rock, Inspirational, Classical, Pop, Electronic, Jazz, Gospel, Alternative, and of course Soundtracks.  I listen to a lot of Christian Rock bands like Relient K, Skillet, Switchfoot, The Almost, The Rocket Summer, The Mint, Third Day, and Stellar Kart to name a few. These bands are really good, and I find them better than anything on mainstream radio. My radio when I actually turn it on is either set to Air1 or KSGN.
 
Now before you start writing me nasty comments about how you think I'm wrong, I do understand that everyone has the right to express themselves in whatever way they wish, but so do I.

Day 28 - That's weird

As I've addressed previously, I'm not very good at meeting new people. And so when I can, I like to use certain socializing tools that I've learned over the years, like asking questions about the other person. I feel that "tell me something interesting about yourself" is a great conversation starter because you never know what to expect.

When I am asked this question I tend to default to "I make YouTube videos." I tend to get a lot of questions out of that one. "What kind of videos do you make?" "You just talk to your camera in your room?" "Can I be in one of your videos?" etc.

And here are some of my other "interesting facts".

When I record videos I tend to finish with anywhere from 10 - 20 minutes of footage, which then get's edited down into a 2 - 3 minute video. I've got epic editing skillz. haha.

When I was in high school I was told dark soda ruins your voice, and so I gave it up for a few years. And now whenever I try to drink Pepsi, Coke, or Dr. Pepper it burns my throat going down. So I tend to shy away from dark sodas, which I suppose is a good habit. It's definitely a lot healthier, especially since a majority of what I drink is water.

I cannot stand kidney beans. I'm pretty sure it's a texture and taste thing. I find them very unappetizing, and will pick them out of whatever I'm eating. I actually don't like to eat whole beans at all. And I've never tried mashed kidney beans, so that could be it.

I eat my pizza, crust first. I have no idea when this start or why, but I don't care if you think it's backwards! haha.

I have a hard time keeping anything on my wrists other than hair bands because when I use my hands to type or write, I rest my wrists on the surface area of my computer or desk. And if I have something on my wrists it makes it uncomfortable.

I eat Peanut M&M's, peanuts first. I bite them in half, eat the peanut, and then eat the outside chocolate shell I won't eat them whole. #weirdiknow

I seldom watch television. Most of the shows I watch are no longer on air, and if they are I watch them on Hulu and Netflix. I just never really have time for TV.

Day 27 - supersharayah

I don't think I've ever formally addressed the story behind my screen name anywhere. I've been asked a few times why I decided to brand myself as "supersharayah" online, and I've always just explained it to them. I think I might make a video about this sooner or later, just in case someone decides to ask.

The story behind my screen name isn't very long. To be honest it's because I'm super and my name is Sharayah. There you go. Haha. Okay, let's step away from the 'My Big Fat Greek Wedding' reference and get to the real story. [Just a side note: I really do love that movie. It's SOO good! haha].

Even at an early age I was a social media junkie. Back in my middle school years, I acquired my first taste of social media through an instant messaging site called AIM. Mind you this was during the time of myspace, which I actually didn't have until my 8th grade year, but that's a whole other story. I used AIM a lot to chat with my friends. And when I grew tired of my screen name, I would just change it. I probably changed my screen name four or five times.

Some drama went down my last year of middle school and by the time I got to high school I decided I needed to have an official screen name. One I wouldn't grow tired of, give out to just anyone or feel like I needed to change every five minutes. I recall having a conversation with a Mr. Brian Thomas McDonald on AIM nonetheless, and during this conversation I asked him what my new screen name should be.

He thought a little while and said "supersharayah". I thought it over and decided it would probably be a good choice. I then proceeded to ask him why supersharayah? And he replied, "Because one day I'm going to teach you how to fly." I of course laughed, but it just kind of stuck. So every social media site I sign up for, I've always claimed "supersharayah". So if you go anywhere online and look up supersharayah, it's probably me. haha.

And also, Mr. Brian Thomas McDonald, if you're reading this, I'm still waiting for my flying lessons! :P

Day 26 - Driving

As soon as all my friends started talking about learning how to drive in high school I wanted to learn to drive. Before I knew it I was registered for driving school and had my permit. This permit granted me access to a car with the supervision of an adult.

The first time I went out driving I was terrified. I didn't really know what to expect. I imagined the racing arcade games. Obviously, I shouldn't floor the gas pedal, and I hoped I would stay away from the concrete walls. haha. My mom refused to teach me how to drive, but my dad's was all for it. He was a little nervous especially since I'm the first to learn, but he was willing to teach me.

Once I got behind the wheel it felt right. With my dad's guidance I think I became a great driver. I was a little nervous with the turns and the freeway, but after lots of practice I got my license the first time I took the test.

Toward the end of the practice period, my mom started to drive with me, but she still doesn't favor it. In her opinion I'm a scary driver and I drive exactly like my dad. My mom likes to be behind the wheel. She makes sure to tell me when to brake and when I'm coming too close behind another car. It's kind of frustrating.

However, I appreciate that she watches out for me, and always tells me to be safe when I leave to hang out with friends. And I do enjoy the times that she does allow me to drive, like today. It made me feel good to be able to give a little something back to them after all they do for my brother and I.

Day 25 - You're Beautiful

Tonight I went to Fish Fest, a concert put on by The Fish 95.9. They basically get a bunch of awesome Christian bands together at the Verizon Wireless Amphitheater for worship and fellowship. We saw Tenth Avenue North, David Crowder Band, Third Day, and MercyMe.

Now I've been to plenty of concerts like this one, and I thought I pretty much knew what to expect. But tonight I heard something I really needed to hear. During MercyMe's set Bart Milliard, lead vocalist, began talking about how in God's eyes we are beautiful. That we are worth His love, and how special we are to Him. And Millard began to sing this song, You're Beautiful, which he wrote for his daughters.

You're Beautiful
Days will come when you don't have the strength
And all you hear is you're not worth anything
Wondering if you ever could be loved
And if they truly saw your heart
They'd see too much

Chorus
You're beautiful, You're beautiful
You are made for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful, You're beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You're beautiful

Praying that you have the heart to fight
'Cause you are more than what is hurting you tonight
For all the lies you've held inside so long
But they are nothing in the shadow of the cross

Repeat Chorus

Before you ever took a breath
Long before the world began
Of all the wonders He possessed
There was one more precious
Of all the earth and skies above
You're the one He madly loves
Enough to die!

You're beautiful, You're beautiful
In His eyes

You're beautiful!
You are made for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful!
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You're beautiful! You're beautiful!
You are made for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful! You're beautiful!
You are treasured
You are sacred
You are His

~~~~~~~

And this made me think of how often times this world has told me otherwise, I have told myself otherwise, people have told me otherwise. The role models that little girls have are ridiculous. These standards cause unhealthy lifestyles, and there's no reason for going to such extremes. Especially when we have a loving Savior who thinks differently. There is so much out there in the world telling us lies. Telling us we're too fat, too skinny, too short, too tall, too ugly, too dumb, etc. However, this is not the case at all. God thinks we're beautiful. And it's unfair for us to think of ourselves anything less because we were made in God's image. And by putting ourselves down, we might as well insult the creator. He sent His only begotten son to suffer and die on a cross, He knows the number of hairs on our heads, He knew us in our mother's wombs, He adores us, and He knows our paths in His purpose long before we even begin to realize it. God's love should be enough. It's an unfathomable love, and it's ours for the taking. And you know what, I'm beautiful, and so are you. :]

Day 24 - VIDCON

Exactly one month from today, Peter and I will be in the company of our good friends Justin, Ev, and Cody. We will be picking them up from LAX and they will be staying with us until VidCon, which will take place July 29 & 30. But of course, it technically starts the 24th for us.

I'm excited to show them around! There is so much that needs to be done and I have no idea how we will be able to do it all in a matter of 4 days. Though I am glad they'll be coming out early because we will be getting major hang out time. Which is almost always limited because of distance. Ev lives in Maryland, while Justin and Cody live in Pennsylvania. I've met both Justin and Cody when I visited Emily over Christmas Break. However, this will be my first time meeting Ev, and it's extremely overdue for the amount of time we talk with one another. We already have plans for MAJOR hugging. haha.

AHH! And KieraJo [one of my roomies] is coming, we definitely have plans for sushi! #omnomnom And then my other roomies Amanda and Natalie are coming! And I am just asdfghjkl. I cannot even comprehend what will be happening. I just know I want it to happen NOW! Leslie, Laurel, Steve, Philip, and so many others who I just cannot wait to hug, hang out with, and be around.

And I absolutely cannot wait to show the Brits, Samuel and Pappy, around southern California after VidCon. It's their first time to America, and I don't want to mess it up. Although, Samuel is pretty pumped for just the food alone. Apparently, we have a lot of different places to eat and some of the junk food America offers they don't have.

I am just so excited for the end of July and the beginning of August, it truly will be an epic two weeks! :D

Day 23 - Top Ten Thing You Should Know About Sharayah

Just in case after 23 days you didn't know enough about me, here's the top ten you should know about me! :]

1) "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13 I serve a mighty and powerful God. I have a wonderful Savior who came to earth as a man and died on a cross to save sinners. His blood has washed me white as snow. And this is something I cannot even fathom, but because of it I aspire to be a woman whose heart is so hidden in God that a man has to seek him just to find me.

2) Writing is my passion. I'm really shy and I find it easier to convey my words through the written word. I think it's easier this way because it gives me more time to figure out how to say things to different audiences. Because of this love of writing, I am currently a Journalism major and am working on figuring out how I will use this gift of writing for God's purpose. I'm a logophile and it amazes me how many beautiful words are out there that people do not use. I like to think I'm becoming more eloquent. haha. And with having a love for writing, I have an even bigger love for reading. I love reading books because they take me to place I never thought I could go!

3) My favorite animals are the Giraffe, the Zebra, and the Brontosaurus. I know, I know. It's a weird combination of animals, but I can't help it. Giraffes are adorable, they have these SUPERLY long necks and they have really long tongues! :P Zebras have beautiful stripes, which set them apart from horses. I loved riding horses when I was younger! And Brontosauruses are just amazing looking, plus I like to RAWR at people.

4) My favorite color used to be bright, lime green. But now I'm starting to realize that I don't specify anymore. I'll take any shade of green. I've been leaning more toward blueish greens. I actually just painted my room a teal-like color, entitled "Mermaid Treasure". It's BEAUTIFUL! I cannot wait to move in and use it as a back drop for my videos.

5) Speaking of videos, I'm a YouTuber. I make videos for two different channels. I have a personal channel supersharayah in which I make videos primarily on my own. It's been described as "diary-like vlogs" and I couldn't agree more. I used to post on a weekly basis, but lately I haven't had a lot of time. The other channel is bachelorettebrigade, a collaboration channel between nerdfighteratalie, shedoesntkillgophers, and myself. I post every Monday on this channel.

6) And because we talked about YouTube, you should probably know I am a social networking fiend. I have Twitter, Facebook, Dailybooth, Tumblr, Instagram, and this blog!! I update all rather frequently, especially Twitter.

7) Rain. I absolutely LOVE when it rains. Whenever it starts raining, you can bet I'm on top of it. I'm one of those people who can enjoy the rain from anywhere. Inside, outside, in a car, in the street, in a puddle. Even the sound gets to me. Against the car, on the window, on a trash can lid. It's basically music to my ears. I just cannot get enough of the rain. I don't know why I live in California. It hardly ever rains here! Thunderstorms are THEBEST! The first night we were in Oklahoma on choir tour, there was a GLORIOUS thunderstorm and I enjoyed ever HOUR of it! Although, I slept through most of it, it was appreciated!

8) My birthday is SEPTEMBER 15TH! Do not let anyone tell you differently. Not my Facebook, not my friends, and especially not Alyson Reeve. Nope. I didn't forget that, girl!

9) I'm not a big fast food eater, especially since I read Fast Food Nation my senior year of high school. It gave me a whole new perspective on the way restaurants receive and prepare their food. When I do eat fast food it tends to be places that were not in the book such as In N Out, Chipotle, Del Taco, Chick-fil-A, and places I can get Chinese food. I love Chinese food and Japanese food for that matter. I can never get enough sushi. Yes, brace yourself, I eat raw fish! haha.

10) I like my food hot, and I don't mean in temperature. Sriracha is pretty much the hot sauce of choice. I eat it on almost everything. And when I say everything I mean pizza, hot dogs, cheeseburgers, chinese food, sushi, and meat loaf. If it's not Sriracha, it's Tapatio. Let's just say I like to spice up my life.

Day 22 - ch-ch-changes

I've been getting really anxious about moving. And not in the I don't want to leave this current house kind of way, rather I wish we were already living there. Of course, we still have a lot to do before everything happens, but I feel like I'm wanting things to change all too quickly. Which I find weird, since I'm not really a big fan of change.

There is a lot changing this year in general. I cannot believe I'm going to be a junior in college, and next year I'll hopefully be graduating. I'll have to figure out what I'll be doing, where I'll be living, if I'll be staying here or going somewhere else. There seem to be a lot of big decisions that are arising.

I'm not exactly sure how to handle what is coming. But I know that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I know that He will be there to guide my path. And though I may make plans, He is the one with the last word. I'm excited to see what He has planned for my life though.

I've been wondering a lot about what will come next, and I feel ready for Him to lay it on me. But I just don't know. I think I should definitely start looking. I want the opportunities for Him to work through me. I desire to get closer to Him. I want to be able to just drop my plans for His, and to just know that I am living a life pleasing to Him.

I really like this whole daily blogging thing. Although, I do not always know what I should blog about, I feel that it gives me a chance to analyze my days. Did I do anything interesting, what should I share? Are there any topics I can address that He will speak through what I have written? I just become really happy when it comes time to blog. :]

Day 21 - yay friends!

I started out today thinking I was going to paint all day, take a quick swim, and possibly go home and curl up with Catching Fire. [That's right I have the second book now. But I know once I start reading it, I will be upset when people will try and take it away from me. So it still lies unread on my desk]. However, my previous plans got warped and I actually ended up spending the day with three of my friends. Not all at once, but amazing regardless.

When Madre and I went over to our new house this morning I decided to call a few of my friends and ask if they wanted to come over to my house, help paint, and then go swimming. Right away I was only able to get Karalee to come for a few hours. So while she was there we got the family room painted? [There's a question mark because I always get the family room and the living room mixed up, so we very well could have painted the living room].

After Karalee left, I drove over and got my friend Manuel. We had fun painting half of the living room [family room?] and then had lunch. Daddie brought us pizza. And then around 2 p.m. we picked up my brother from band camp. When we came back we decided it was time to go swimming because we felt like we had worked hard enough for the day. [Although, we didn't finish. >.<] And Lauren came and went swimming with us after she got out of class.

We swam for about 3 hours, it was glorious. It was really relaxing and fun to just chill with some friends for awhile. It had been quite awhile since I had seen any of them. Once we finished swimming, Lauren and I went new bathing suit hunting and Manuel tagged along. He paid attention to his phone most of the time, which is understandable and we really didn't find anything anyway.

We had dinner at Red Robin [YUM! haha]. Apparently they have patty melts and sweet potato fries now. Guess what I got! If you answered what I previously just said plus a Freckled Lemonade, you would be right. Good job! haha. We talked about a lot of things and just enjoyed each other company and the food. haha.

It was great to be able to hangout with friends after it being so long. There was lots to catch up on and I kind of want it to be next week already! BEACH! YAY! Well, AND FRIENDS! YAY! :D

Day 20 - Summer breezes

The last couple of weeks I've been simulating road trips when I drive in my car. I roll the windows down, let the wind blow through my hair, blast my music, and just drive. Of course, no road trip is complete without friends, but so far that hasn't really been an option.

I've been just itching to take a road trip. I think one to Florida to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter would be a nice trip. [Gosh, I'm such a nerd. haha]. But with how things are playing out, I don't think I'll be getting much of a road trip any time soon. So, I like to trick myself into thinking I am.

As lame as this sounds, it makes my drives to and from work more enjoyable. The drive to school and back is about a half hour both ways. So I try to make it fun.

Although, today wasn't too fun. Since I've been driving with the windows down, I haven't been using the A/C. So on the way home it was about 92 degrees Fahrenheit and I was burning up [for you baby]. But in all seriousness, the weather has been acting up a lot lately.

It was beach weather for a couple weeks, rather windy, not too hot. But then a couple days ago we were getting gloomy overcast weather. And then it rained, well more sprinkled, yesterday morning. Today was scorching though. Luckily, I was not in it too long. Just to my car and all the way home.

Despite the heat, I did not roll up my windows, there was a slightly nice breeze coming in from the drive. And I refused to change my ways. I just really want a road trip.

Let's go! :]

Day 19 - My Daddie

I figured since it's Father's Day, I might as well blog about my Daddie.

I have been extremely blessed by my Father in heaven for such an amazing Daddie. My Daddie has always been there for me when I have needed him. He's been a strong rock for our family and an excellent example of a godly man to my little brother and I. An example to my brother of how he should be as a husband, and an example to myself on how a man should treat his wife. He's always worked hard to provide for our family and still make time for us after work. My Daddie has taught me well. He's taught me right and wrong, how to earn a dollar, and how to save it too. He loves his family dearly and you can tell.

Things I remember about my Daddie as I was growing up.

He sits at the bottom of the stairs every morning and puts on his tennis shoes.

His hands are always stained with ink.

He's a very sneaky man and when you think he's leaning one way, he's really going the other.

He's an excellent cook, his spaghetti and gumbo cannot be beat.

He's very protective and makes sure we make the right decisions.

He's insightful and always has the answer.

He can always tell when something is up, especially when I'm not telling the truth.

He knows my car better than I do.

Even when I do stupid things, he still loves me, and I love him for it. :]

Day 18 - You're not shy!

I'm coming to a point where I'm not exactly sure whether I lean more toward being shy or outgoing. I think my level of outgoingness depends on the situation and the people rather than just myself. I feel I'm not in control of how I interact with others. There are all kinds of factors that are put into play upon interacting/ meeting others.

When I'm with friends or family, I'm actually rather loud. I speak my mind, I act silly, and I can carry a conversation. And most of my friends would tell you I'm not shy at all if you asked them. With friends and family around, I would consider myself a very outgoing person because I'm in my comfort zone and they already know how I am.

But when I first meet someone I usually don't talk very much and I don't openly share a lot about myself unless asked. I tend to be more reserved and am more of an observer/ listener. Especially when I'm surrounded by people I do not know very well. Most of the time I try to avoid such situations, but some times they are unavoidable.

I have a bit of a hard time meeting new people because I'm afraid they won't like me. Now I don't really care what people think about me, I'm going to be myself whether they like it or not. But some times I feel like I already have my friends, why do I need to make any new ones?

And that's where I get upset with myself because I realize I could be a person that becomes a very important part of someone else's life. God could use me in a way that ministers to those people. I could change a person's life by just beginning with a hello and a smile.

And I think that's probably another part that scares me. What if I'm the one to screw it up for them? And so my internal thoughts are fighting with one another "You need to go over there" and "No you don't, keep walking."

However, there are times when I have no problem talking to people. And I think it's when either the real Sharayah comes out or the journalist within me takes over. I don't consider myself a great public speaker, rather a person who is good with words on a paper. But sometimes when I get going and the pressure is on, I can have a conversation with someone I don't know without even batting an eye.

These are the times I enjoy. When I don't worry about screwing up, I just go and handle it. I feel like more often I need to take more initiative and courage, and just get out there and be a light. I want people to look at me and think there is something different about her.

I think I'm getting better at this. Women's Choir helped me with this because before concerts we'd have to mingle with people before concerts. And for a while I'd just kind of walk around and talk to other girls in the choir.

But then I talked to the girls in my small group about how I struggled with meeting people and they gave me some advice and pointers on how to strike up conversations. And then every concert after that I was able to keep conversations going with people I barely knew. It also helped during the host homes we stayed with on tour.

I'm hoping this will also help during this next school year. I'm surprisingly excited to try it out. :]

Day 17 - Day of reading

Today I decided to set aside time to read The Hunger Games. Now as I write this blog, I am not finished with the book, but I'm awfully close. I'm currently 66 pages from the end. I have every intention of finishing this wonderful book tonight, and plan to do so once this blog has been written.

It's been awhile since I've actually had a spare moment to actually read a book for pleasure. I think with all the hustle and bustle of school, I dwell more time on my coursework and my job. I'm always setting my eye on what needs to get done and I don't really have the time to set aside just for myself. And I'm glad that I actually had time to do this today, because as far as I'm consider you should read this book and I'm not even finished with it yet. [That's when you know it's a good book].

As a child I had a passion for reading. Even when I was unable to read for myself, I remember my Madre reading to me. My Madre, a bibliophile herself instilled a love for books in me early on. She read book after book and story after story.

I recall countless summers spent at the city library. Signing up for book clubs in which I had to read a certain amount of books to gain the next level, and a new prize. I recall reading books as school assignments, taking tests, and gaining accelerated reading points. Which earned me trophies for just plain reading.

But I didn't do the reading for the trophies or the gift certificates or any of that. [Actually, I'm not exactly sure if this is entirely true. When I was younger it could've been motivated by that]. I did it for the books themselves. I especially liked it when authors write so well, I feel like I'm actually there. I can feel the emotions the characters are experiencing. I can relate to the story line. I can picture myself as a character, as a bystander there.

Reading gives me such joy. I love being transported to somewhere I've never been, doing things I never thought I could. It's amazing what one book can do. And it's not just the stories, but the inspiration behind them and the inspiration they give me.

As a journalist I can say I love to write. I want to be like the authors of my favorite books. I want to write stories that people enjoy as much as I have enjoyed previous books. I want to inspire people to do things they never thought possible. I want to motivate people to travel, to love, to jump outside of their comfort zones, to pursue God, etc.

I think I need to spend more time reading. It's something I quite enjoy. :]

Day 16 - Pictures are worth a thousand words

As I write these blogs I realize I spend a lot of time on Skype, especially at night. Ever since summer started, some of my YouTube friends and I been having almost nightly Skype video chats that last until about 1 or 2 a.m. This cannot be healthy for my sleep schedule, but if I went to sleep I'm afraid I'll miss everything. Not to brag or anything, but we have some pretty legit conversations.

Tonight amongst all the jokes and laughter we began sharing awkward and silly pictures of our younger selves. At first I had some difficulty locating mine because I was the type of person who hated having my picture taken when I was younger. And if I did have it taken, I didn't post it unless I looked presentable in it. I was and still kind of am a self-conscience person.

But each picture shared got me thinking about the stories behind them. My friends and who they used to be. Who they now are. Myself. How far I've come. Who I was and who I am today. I'm not the same person I was 10 years ago. And In 10 years, I'll be looking back on the pictures that currently find themselves situated on my Facebook.

Now it intrigues [mind you, I can never spell this word right. But I did tonight! woo!] me how cameras work. They capture what the eyes see forever. They take some of our memories, the ones that fade, and they keep them safe for us. And we then look back on them later and it just clicks. Things forgotten have become refreshed. Patterns are acknowledged. Beauty is captured.

All by one click of a button. An import of a memory card. The storing of a hard drive. And it's there. Forever. Until you throw it in the trash. And it's gone.

But when you stumble upon these old memories. You cannot help, but smile. Reminiscing of the good times, the bad times, and the in between times. I realize that what I was self-conscience of before is irrelevant. Who cares what I look like. It's more about the moments. Pictures are worth a thousand words. The stories behind each picture are what really count; let's give them a novel to write about. :]

Day 15 - Chocolate

This is not a blog about how much I love chocolate. Au contraire. I am actually not a big fan of chocolate. And as a woman I have been asked multiple times what is wrong with me. Now don't get me wrong, I don't hate chocolate. It's just not something I can just partake in at any moment. I have to be in the mood for chocolate. And even when I am in the mood, it's usually a certain kind.

Yeah, chocolate is sweet, delicious, and chocolatey, but I find it rather bland alone. I cannot just eat a big Hershey bar. Not even a Hershey bar with almonds. I specifically pick the almonds out of the chocolate and eat them. I know, I know it's weird, but it's what I do.

Chocolate cannot stand alone. It needs caramel [pronounced care-a-mel], krispies, lots of nuts, toffee, peanut butter, and all sorts of things they put in chocolate. Chocolate milk is also delicious, when I'm not having to deal with lactose intolerance. And I can handle brownies in small doses.

What I find funny is that Reeses Pieces are my favorite, and they have chocolate in them. HOWEVER. I feel like Reeses Pieces are 95% peanut butter, 5% chocolate. Which I guess that makes it not so funny, rather it makes sense. Especially since I love peanut butter. I favor the creamy kind, and will eat the crunchy if I absolutely have to. But I should probably stop this discussion before I start another Peanut Butter War like I did last summer.

Back to chocolate, I don't understand what the big deal is. Who cares if I don't really care for chocolate? Everyone always forgets though. And then when I say I don't like chocolate they all flip out on me. "YOU DON'T LIKE CHOCOLATE!?!?!" No. Not really. It's OK.

I should probably tell you as I'm typing this up I'm eating a brownie sundae with cookies and cream ice cream, caramel, bananas, and cool whip. Can you guess my favorite part of it?

The bananas. #omnomnom

Day 14 - Two Years Already?

You all will be please to know that I did succeed at packing up my room. It took awhile for me to get down to business [to defeat the HUNS!] Sorry, just as soon as I typed that Mulan came to mind and it's now playing through my head. But anyways, it did take me awhile to get started. But when I finally did, I quite enjoyed it.

I had a plethora of possessions to go through, but I got it done. I filled up two trash bags. So this brings the grand total to 4.5 trash bags. I couldn't believe how many things I had kept over the years I didn't need. I definitely need to be smarter about what memories are important and which I just need to get rid of.

In the midst of everything I found my yearbook from my senior year of high school. I spent some time looking through it. Reminiscing over pictures and reading the messages friends had written to me. It made me realize it's been practically two years since I graduate high school and so much has changed!

I've become a whole new Sharayah. I've lost, gained, and held onto friends. I've come closer to God, and strengthened my walk. I've broke old habits and created new ones. I've come out of my shell, taken chances, and realized everything is not about me. And with all the changes and challenges I've overtaken, I've realized everything has been for the better, for God's purpose in my life.

The time in between graduating high school and becoming a junior in college has gone by fast. And I'm excited to see where God will have me in the next two years, when I'll be graduating from college. Where I'll be headed, who I'll be friends with, and how strong I'll have become.

And I know I told you all I would completely avoid the computer today. But I did cheat at one point. As I was packing I realized a light on the side of my laptop was glowing. This light only glows when its on, and I could've sworn I had shut it down. So I opened it to investigate and sure enough I didn't. You all wouldn't have known this though! I made sure not to do anything that would make people aware. But I'm being honest with you all. :]

Day 13 - Productivity Please

Tomorrow needs to follow today's productivity. We got a lot done at work today. Lots of planning for the new school year. We were finally able to acquire a link for our Facebook fan page and the likes keep coming. I'm really excited about the changes being done to the newspaper. At first I was worried, but now I have nothing but optimism. I know we still need to figure out some web issues. But I want it to be training day. I really want to meet all the new staff members and just have a really great year.

I think I'll finish packing tomorrow. I'll get up early and just spend the day packing. It needs to happen because before I know it, everyone else will be moving and I'll be scrambling to get my stuff together. And to be honest there's not a whole lot that need to be done. It's just all the nonessential stuff. I feel like it will be a piece of cake. At least I hope so.

I just need to crank up the tunes and lay off the Internet. I think the Internet is one of my biggest problems. Especially tumblr. Jeez. That site is amazing. There are so many pretty gifs and quotes. I just want to get on there now. It's helped me discover so many beautiful things. Like Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog. If you haven't seen it do yourself a favor, GO WATCH IT! So good.

As great as tumblr is, it sucks up my time. Time I could be applying to productivity. Especially since I do have a lot to do.

To Do List:
Pack
Get rid of unneeded excess things
Find MY headphones
Clean
Deposit check
Finish painting room
Plan out room
Read Hunger Games
Finish How I Met Your Mother
Start Big Bang Theory
Get people rounded up for a beach trip
Hang out with friends
Have fun
Plot out a new supersharayah video

As you can see all the fun stuff is at the end. Work before play. Unless I get stressed out, then we'll work a system. But I doubt it will happen. Helloooo, Summer. haha.

So I vow to not use the computer until I am either completely packed or it's blogging time.

Day 12 - I just want to be busy

I've done a lot over the last two weeks, but I'm also done a whole lot of nothing. I'm starting to feel like I haven't gotten anything done. I feel like the things I have done aren't really making an impact. Catching up in Doctor Who, working, and painting my "new" room don't seem to be fulfilling this epic summer I had planned.

I haven't really seen any of my friends either because I've been trying to avoid going out and spending money. I need to start saving better and not blowing it on just anything. At the rate I'm going I feel like summer won't get any better until the end of July.

There is tons I can do instead of just being lazy. Right before I started writing this blog, I was watching episodes of How I Met Your Mother. Another show that I want to get up to date on. There's a plethora of shows I'd like to catch up on. But I feel like I need to be more productive.

I did paint more of my room today, and one of the downstairs rooms which still needs to be finished. And that's slightly productive. But not as productive as I want to be.

I still haven't packed anymore of my stuff away. That really needs to get done. I have a lot to sift through. I'm hoping to get rid of more stuff. There's just too much unnecessary junk.

I also need to read The Hunger Games. I borrowed the book from Krista before I left for choir tour and I've only opened it once. I'm starting to feel guilty for hanging onto it for so long.

I could probably continue to try to teach myself to knit, or maybe even finally get around to teaching myself how to play guitar or piano.

I quite enjoy the blogging I've been doing. I'm definitely going to keep it up. I feel so proud of myself for blogging 12 consecutive days. It feels like an accomplishment, no matter how minuscule the task is. I think it also helps me reflect on what kind of day I had.

I think for the most part today was okay. Went to church, breakfast, painted forever, ate gumbo, and just spent a lot of time on my computer. I kinda wish there was more listed, but to be quite honest, painting forever is not an understatement.

Here's to hoping this week will be more productive! Cheers! :]

Day 11 - Fresh Coat of Paint

So as I stated yesterday my "new" room is getting a fresh coat of paint. I carried out this task today. I figured it was going to be no problem because I was under the impression I'd be helped. However, I ended up painting my whole room by myself.

Now mind you, it's not completely done. There's still some painting that needs to be done around the ceiling fan, smoke detector, and my closet. But these places were too high for me to reach. So in a few days I'll be bringing a ladder back to finish it all up. And I might even end up painting another room in the house the same color because we have a whole gallon of paint left over.

It didn't take me too long to decide on a color. I sort of already had one in mind. I just need to figure out the right shade of it. I had picked out a nice, dark tealish turquoise entitled 'Peacock Feather'. However, my father informed me it would probably dry darker. So we went with 'Mermaid Treasure' instead.

Painting the room was a lot of work. Especially since I really had no idea as to what I was doing. The last time we painted my room, my parents did most of the work. And this time around I did kind of want to do it by myself because I felt like I would appreciate it more, and because I really didn't have much of a choice. But I really like it. It looks so pretty. I'm very satisfied with the color, and how it's turned out so far.

It did take me awhile to get the whole room painted, but it was a lot of fun regardless. I started out thinking about how people paint on television and how sometimes they get covered in paint. I was really hoping I would avoid this. And I felt lin the groove about five minutes in, until I stepped on the paint can lid.

Luckily I had put down a drop cloth, so I didn't make too much of a mess. But the bottom of my foot was covered in paint for the rest of the day. I manage to get most of the paint on the walls, but paint did appear on my face, clothes, legs, arms, and in my hair. [When painting, do not get too close to the wall]

Though it took awhile to paint the entire room, I felt like it went rather fast. I did a lot of thinking and singing while I worked. Lots of reflection on the room and how I can further improve it's looks before I actually move into it. I thought about hanging a curtain as the closet door instead of having to deal with the doors. I got this inspiration from my best friend, Natalie's room. I also am in dire need of a new door. And it really needs a lock. Preferably one that cannot be picked. [Does anybody knock anymore?] I'm not sure about the window yet though. I think I might just keep the blinds, but curtains might be nice too.

There's still lots of time to think about that though. In the mean time I really need to get everything packed up so that I can actually take it over to the house when we're ready to move in. I only have three boxes packed. And one of them was a prepacked box from when we moved into the house we're currently living in. I'll hopefully be getting this done sometime this week. :]

Day 10 - Packing, packing and more packing

One of the worst parts of moving is the packing. At least that's what I remember from the last time we moved. In the course of my life time I have moved twice. This is my third time. It's technically not a "new" house considering we're moving into our old house. But over the last three or so years, I've grown accustom to this room, this space, my own bathroom.

And now we're moving back. I don't mind too much. The only negatives of the move are, I will not longer have my own bathroom because I will have to share with my brother. I'm hoping this does not rise any unnecessary conflict because he definitely goes to school way earlier than I do. So it shouldn't be too big of a deal.

And the house is about 10 extra minutes from school. This only means I'll need to leave for school earlier. Which I don't think will be a huge problem because as I said, I go to school later. I am not a morning person. haha.

Which aren't as big as the positives. In our new house, I'll be slapping on a new coat of paint to give the room a new look, and there's a pool in which I'll be doing lots of swimming in this summer.

As cool as this will be, I find myself having a hard time bringing myself to pack. I just don't desire to do so. And it's not because I don't want to move. I have nothing against it. In fact from the little packing I have done, I've also thrown out a lot. I've already filled up two trash bags and a little university bookstore bag.

I've come to the conclusion that I am a bit of a pack rat. I have a "memory box" if you will, in my room dedicated to old movie ticket stubs, concert tickets, wristbands, birthday/ Christmas/ Valentine's cards. However, there's lots in my room which doesn't fall under any of those categories. And I'm glad I figured this out now.

I really want to make sure that at this "new" house, I'm extremely organized. Because I'm definitely one of the least organized people I know, hands down. And I feel like the move will help that, at least I hope it does.

Butterflies are beautiful. Just for you Natalie. ;]

Day 9 - Lots of random facts

Today, I've learned so many new random facts and I thought I should share them with all of you.

Giraffes travel in towers. [This makes me smile because I feel this is definitely appropriate. Giraffes are pretty much towers].

The word "nerd" was first coined by Dr. Seuss in "If I Ran the Zoo." [I owe a lot to Dr. Seuss. He's the reason I have friends. haha. He paved my childhood and he gave the term to my way of life].

The human heart creates enough pressure to squirt blood 30 ft. [I can just picture people using their hearts as guns, like *pew, pew, pew* YOU'RE DEAD! Except you're not . . .because you're covered in blood. Nevermind . . .]

The tip of the shoe lace is called the aglet. [I had no idea they even had a name. I just referred to them as the shoe lace holders for when I tie my shoes or the plastic at the end.

It is physically impossible for a pig to lift it's head up toward the sky. [This one made me really sad for piggies. I need to lift a few up to see the beautiful creations God has made].

When you snap your fingers, the sound is created from your middle finger hitting your palm and not your thumb rubbing against your index finger. [I tested this one. It checks out. But it makes me wonder how some people cannot snap if it's the middle finger to palm?]

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. [I knew the dentist was out to get me. Just couldn't be satisfied with my teeth. RUDE].

Mosquitoes are more attracted to people who just ate bananas. [I love bananas. I hate mosquitos. This poses a problem].

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is the fear of long words. [If this is the word for the fear of long words it must have been created by one who doesn't. But I don't understand how someone can be afraid of words. I LOVE WORDS!]

Until President Kennedy was assasinated, it wasn't illegal to assasinate the president. [Wait. President Lincoln was assassinated WAAAAY before President Kennedy. How did this go so long without being addressed? But then again, I think they probably thought it was common sense that you shouldn't assassinate the president. Jeez].

"Mountain Dew" is an old slang term for moonshine. [I wonder if maybe there was originally moonshine in the first attempts at Mountain Dew].

The Statue of Liberty wears a size 879 sandal. [And I thought my size ten was pretty big].

I've also decided that every so often I'm going to be releasing tweets entitled #nowyouknow and with this I will be informing my followers of random, interesting facts. Keep a look out for that @supersharayah

Day 8 - Like old times

Last year I got more involved in the YouTube community. Did a lot more watching, a lot more commenting, and a lot more vlogging. In the midst of these I stumbled upon the VLOG MANOR. This was a project that was going on for the entire year of 2010. But it wasn't until April, I began to make friends.

I stumbled upon a group of vloggers who would tinychat quite often. Tinychat is a site in which people can all chat on web cam at once. Only 12 people can at once. And they would always fill them all up. They'd talk about anything and everything and it was ALWAYS entertaining. Made up of nerdfighters, raptor screechers, do it themselvers, and serial killer enthusiasts.

These people were really awesome and I soon found myself making sure I made it to each tinychat. I soon became friends with these people and consider them some of my closest friends. We spent the whole summer talking to each other and staying up until the wee hours of the morning. But it was one of the best summers of my life.

These people have come to mean so much more to me. And I've slowly been meeting each of them over the course of this year.

However, we all really haven't had a whole lot of time to talk as one group because we're all different ages and have either school, work or both to deal with. The group has grown mightly, and we've had our bonds grow stronger. And tonight has been the first night in a very long time where we've all been able to have fun with one another.

It feels just like old times, nothing has changed. Random discussions that lead into another. Quotes that are tweetworthy. Each person with their quirks and mannerisms. Accents and all. I love this group so hard. They are some of the best people I've never/have met.

I definitely cannot wait till the end of next month. VidCon is going to be so EPIC and BEAUTIFUL. HUGS ALL AROUND! :]

Day 7 - Women's Choir Tour 2011

So I had intended on making a vlog about this once I had returned home from tour. I've been home three weeks now? And I haven't made a single video about anything. I've been in a bit of a video slump. But I just don't feel like this topic would've been easily conveyed through words.

I didn't have a very good attitude at the beginning of tour. I mean two weeks on the road with I don't know how many women? That's enough estrogen to drive a girl mad. Plus I had already been out for a week, so I felt teased and cheated by summer. Summer had lied to me. It wanted to get me excited only to bring me down.

I was dead wrong. Tour had to be the best thing ever. Get up early, sleep on the bus, eat lunch, sleep on the bus again, curl my hair, set up a bass amp, eat dinner, put on a dress, sing for the Lord, get paired up with girls I sort of knew and families I didn't know, get chummy for the night, and then repeat it all over again. I mean who wouldn't kill for a life like that?!

And believe me, a couple of days like that and BAM! Attitude altered. Tour quickly became extremely great. We got to meet so many great families! I heard so many touching stories and testimonies. And each night was a new surprise. Some hosts were extremely hospitable and wanted to know our life stories. While others were more reserved, chatted for a little while and then sent us off to bed because I mean two weeks of travel through 3 different time zones is exhausting.

However, I really liked when the families wanted to talk all night long. As much as wanted to go to sleep, I really enjoyed speaking with them. It was interesting to see how other people know the Lord. How they praise Him, and the faith that each of them possessed. It was very refreshing and helped me reshape my faith. I felt like the Lord was at work every where we went and we could feel it.

Especially, the night we went to the Oklahoma City Rescue Mission. I went in absolutely terrified. I didn't really know what to expect or how to deal with the situations presented to us. I felt uneasy and unsure of how to react. And once people began filing in and taking seats, I felt like those feelings got progressively worse. But once we started singing, I realized everything was in the Lord's hands. I needed to be still and know that He is God, and He was protecting us and using us to touch the people there.

I think the moment that touched me the most was after we sang the song Grace. We began singing Amazing Grace and the people watching joined in with us. I had never cried at a concert before that point. And it just felt like I viewed everything differently. We all had those words in common. We all had been saved through the blood of Jesus Christ dying on the cross. We all have sinned in different ways, but we are all equal, we've been washed as white as snow.

The bus rides were pretty awesome as well. We got rather close to everyone. Since we were combined in such a tiny space for two weeks. Not a lot of moving around happened. But when it did, it sometimes became permanent. I started with a seat all my own. But I was soon invaded and I understand now that was for good.

I tried to invest a lot of time in the other girls and I hope that I blessed some of their lives as much as they blessed mine. Especially Kira, Aly, and Star. Those girls made huge impacts on me. Showing me their compassion, kindness, and love for God. I grew so close to them, and they definitely helped me grow over the course of tour. We bonded, and just kinda meshed together. I miss each of them so very much. But I know that the three of them are lasting friendships that I hope to carry.

Women's Choir Tour was an amazing experience. I grew a lot the past two years, spiritually and vocally. Women's Choir was a joyful and safe place. I'm still a bit sad about not being able to continue it next year. I'm crossing my fingers for second semester. But that's TBD. Regardless the experience I've had in Women's Choir will be something I cherish forever. :]